May 7, 2020
Today is a 2 numerology day. A day of decisions. Of turning points. Which direction will you go? Have you identified clearly the two things you feel torn between? Or is it still buried in the subconscious. I think there’s actually two things you’re grappling with. One of them has to do with life purpose. And you’re clear on what you want, but not clear on how that will manifest. Your commitment level is a bit one foot in the door one foot out. Caught between the old safety net and the new possibility which is your passion and life destiny.
I also detect the subconscious thing that has you torn between two paths, is in regards to relationships. There’s a bit of a pattern of behavior you keep perpetuating, which keeps what you want away, and you don’t even know you’re doing it!
That leads me into the past position card. The Knight of Cups Reversed. This is a boy who is an adolescent. He’s not quite an adult and not quite a kid anymore. This teen is staring into the past, seeing how people treated him, which threw him into isolation. Not feeling any sense of control over how to affect better treatment to receive more love. As a child you don’t have much power, as an adolescent you’re just finding your voice, learning how to set boundaries (if you’re lucky) and learning how to be an adult in the world. You might currently be acting from a wound you received in your teen years. How were you treated in regards to friendship or love? Dig a little to see if you started to isolate then, and what was the first incident of it. If it isn’t isolation but the opposite manifestation of not being emotionally available, when did you start acting overly promiscuous? Thinking that validation would fulfill that hole or missing piece. Ultimately, this is in the past position, because you realized. “This is not what I want or how I want to live anymore.”
I see in the present position, there’s some digging in the subconscious to do, to unravel this pattern you don’t quite see yet. Examine your beliefs about love. Meditate Pray for the insight to pop into your awareness. I get it’s deep in the subconscious but causing lots of turmoil on the surface. 2 of Swords Reversed.
You seem to keep thinking to yourself. Here’s my new beginning. And then it doesn’t move forward. Here’s my new beginning. Nothing happens. And you’re left disappointed and wanting to give up. Every time you muster up a bit of courage, or faith or trust, you are left wanting. There’s a habitual behavoir, sabotaging thinking patterns that are the cause of this. Stop post-poning manifesting the type of relationship you want. Instead, of stop start stop start, keep going. Try other paths or roads. Trust the process. Also, lean on others. Don’t try to be so independent and self-reliant about it. Ask others if they see the self-sabotaging beliefs you might be holding? 6 of Swords Reverse
What seems to be in your way, is still the enoughness from yesterday. You are afraid to let your light shine, afraid someone is going to try to snuff it out, again. It’s that song “This little light of mine, I’m gonna let it shine, this little light of mine, I’m gonna let it shine. Let it shine, let it shine, let it shine.” And if someone tries to surpress you, shine anyway, and tell them where they can go…..Right on outta your life. Queen of Wands Reverse
Your letting your mind get the best of you, and create fears that aren’t really present. Let it go. Release it, move on. I was listening to Abraham Hicks a couple days ago, and she gave this analogy of are you in the boat paddling upstream against the current or downstream with the current. Because it’s the mind that can take you either way. Are you in gratitude or are you focusing on what you don’t have, lack mentality. Are you following the hints, guidance and resources coming your way, or are you avoiding taking action on them? Are you stressed out, anxious, irritated, or are you in joy? Your mindset affects your emotions, affects your physical body, effects your aura. Try to stay in the most positive vibration that feels authentic to you. Get back in the flow of your life? If something feels out of alignment, stop putting your action energy there, instead redirect towards creating the life you want.
In the future, I see you crafting the life of balance you want. Between life purpose and income, relationships and love, work and play, etc. You have to get to the root of it though, and pull that weed out of your mental garden who’s roots are buried in your subconscious.
Love and light friends. Sometimes life requires more work on our part, to manifest the life we’re dreaming of. This week is one of those times. Today especially introspect, especially if you’ve been putting it off. <3